update also

Sitting at the dinner table cooking steaks in the oven and listening to christmas music, trying to get into the spirit. Its kind of getting there.
Otis redding. the pogues the ramones. all good stuff. kind of dark but thats ok. at least im not wallowing in deprression. Oh i have things to be depressed about. i could list them but to hell with them today and tonight. I pay too much homage to them most days and what do they give me in return? shit thats what.
so tonight its just the good stuff.
delusional? you bet!

The return of the king

Am watching the above titled movie at the moment. I am well aware that this is a work of fiction but I am still amazed by the power of this particular film. Oh not the production quality and things like that. No. I refer instead to its sheer power to inspire.
It makes you proud to just be human, a part of this great thing that is man when he chooses to be so. I was moved to tears and this is of course not my first viewing.
Perhaps I'm just emotionally unstable these days ( smile)

nice

A nice day. Much like yesterday. I am thankful for all i have and less bitter about the things i dont.
Son brought his girlfriend who was nice despite the ups and downs they have been going though.
Food was nice. Family get together was nice.
I guess what im saying is it was...nice. lol

When"s my turn?

    A good day. Have my grandson and his Mini Chew wa wa all day. He is a bright light to me even though he's kind of out grown his gumpa now. (smile)

    I'm mellow and centered. Not fighting with anyone today for the first time in what feels like weeks. Things feel..right Thanksgiving will be fun. Fried turkey and crab/shrimp/sausage stuffing. enough said lol. Will pig out then take a nap. life doesn't get any better.

   i am thankful for all the things i have and the people in my life. I hope for more understanding but I'm seeing things from my perspective and possibly not the reality of some things. I am trying to do whats best for me though. I've had a lifetime of doing whats best for others. Whens my turn?

quick writing contest

terrible minds had a writing contest where you have one word to use as a topic or piece of the story that had to be created with only 100 words.
The choices were frog powder seagull tower or scissors.
i chose powder. Here it is.
It was quite fun by the way. (smile)

    the woman screamed, waves of pain crashing over her. Her arms, had been sliced bare, striped like bacon.
    the man behind the fool's mask methodically sprinkled a grey powder into her wounds. He was mumbling "for Rachael" over and over.
    Her pain began to deaden after that Her wounds seemed to heal before her eyes and she felt detached as her thoughts floated.
    Another  man was approaching now from a good distance clothed in black blotting out the light. The image looked familiar, particularly the thing in his hand.There was no face. just a cloak, a skull, and a scythe.

Spicy Hawaiian pizza and football. Not the raiders which would rule,but the packers which are not uncool. My mod is bright and for the most part things seem alright in my world today.

today

Consumed with gloom. (smile)
Alas another one of those dark moods threatening to ruin everything despite the sunshine.
Im fighting today though. Plan to go out and make myself do something...nice, for me.

Going to buy me some guitar strings. My guitar has been catching dust beside the couch next to me for years now. Lately i have been listening to music again though and the urge to play has come back. My goals seem much clearer now. Its for the pure visceral joy of playing as opposed to the ego strokes i sought so vigerously in my youth.
I have been listening to Patty Griffin and she's completely reinspired me lol.
i plan to learn her songs and just walk around at home playing girl folk songs out loud.
I think my deep broken voice wil add a certain charm to her sad songs.
been listening to Dylan too. Im so folked out these days lol.
anyway. wanting to keep things kind of updated here so ive accomplished that much at least today. (smile)